Fish-Mouth

But today, I want to share my heart with you, a message. We are in a series called My Big Fat Mouth. How many of you would agree that we have big fat mouths? And I'm not, don't nudge your wife, okay? I saw that back there.

I saw that. No, no, don't nudge your wife. Don't nudge your husband. Don't nudge your boyfriend or your fiance. Don't nudge your mother-in-law, okay?

I know that that's hard not to do, but this isn't about their big fat mouth. This is about your big fat mouth, right? So, we're in a series called My Big Fat Mouth. And last week, we discovered that our mouths are powerful. They're actually powerful weapons.

They have, I like to say, superhero power. And they have the ability to cause tremendous good, and they also have the ability to cause tremendous damage. In fact, this is how powerful a tongue could be. I could stand up here today with this little mic on my cheek here, and I could say just a few things, and I could end everything that I'm capable of doing or I was doing. I could end this ministry.

I could harm and hurt. I could cause fires that we could not put out just by the power of this microphone, by the power of this mouth. And you guys would come in next Sunday, and you'd see one of my overseers up here, and he'd say, Y'all remember Leon? Remember what he said? He's sorry, but he will not be back.

That's how powerful the tongue is, that we can say something that could... And we were reminded that our words influence the direction and quality of our life. But not only that, they influence the direction and quality of others. The people that are around you, the people that you talk to, the people that you have conversations with. And we were also reminded that our mouths are terribly unpredictable.

We can't control them. So we should set guards on our life. We should put a warden in place over our mouths because as James left us off with, he didn't have any application for us. He just said, hey, doom and gloom, bye-bye, y'all figure it out, right? So he didn't have an application for that.

Why was that? Because it's always something that we're going to battle. Our mouths are powerful. They're powerful weapons. And they have the potential to undermine our futures.

They have the potential to undermine our relationships. And they have the potential to undermine people that are closest to us. And James said last week, our mouths are so unpredictable that... We need leashes, that we need bridles, that we need things to control our mouths, and it's something incredible. And we left you with this, quick to listen, slow to speak.

Quick to listen, slow to speak. What did we do last week? We hold up our fists. If you want to do that again, hold up your fists and just release. Quick to listen, slow to speak.

Quick to listen. I got to listen. I really got to listen. And slow to speak. So last week we left you, you know, since James didn't give us any kind of practical application, I left you with these three things that we need to remember, we need to surrender, and confess.

We need to remember that our mouths are very powerful. Anytime we're going into a conversation, anytime we're going into a situation, we need to remember, right, I've got a mouth on me, and I need to control it, and I need to be careful with it. And then we need to surrender it. We surrender it every day to our Heavenly Father, right? This is how we do it.

We surrender, Lord, I surrender my life. I need to be quick to listen. Help me to be quick to listen and slow to speak. And then we confess, right? We confess.

We own our fires. If we start a fire, we own it. It's our fault, right? So we take ownership of that, and we work on that, right? We work on that.

We confess it to our Lord, and we confess it to the people that perhaps we've hurt, and we've caused damage to. So now we're going to move from James to Paul, because he has something to say about our mouths as well. And we looked at this ancient document in James, and obviously we didn't get a lot of application, but Paul weighs in, and he steps into the history as Saul of Tarsus. And what we know about Saul of Tarsus is that he lived north of Jerusalem, and he was a persecutor. He was a Pharisee.

In fact, he said he was the Pharisee among Pharisees. In fact, when Jesus was being tried, when Jesus was being tried, some documentation, some research, some commentaries suggest that Paul was perhaps one of those Pharisees that was in the room, in the background, watching Jesus be tried. And he decided he was going to end this thing called Christianity, this knockoff religion, Jewish religion, called the way that was taking place. So he goes down to Jerusalem. He talks to the Sanhedrin.

He says, I'm going to end this. Give me the authority. Give me the privilege to do this. I am honored to do it. I will go out, and I will take it.

On this thing called the Way, this religion called the Way. So he would take them in, he would imprison them, torture them, and in some cases even put them to death, as we have in the case of Stephen. He was put to death as Saul of Tarsus was standing by watching that take place. But then something happens. Something incredible happens.

As Saul is traveling to Damascus, he has a visit from Jesus and he becomes a Jesus follower. That's where we get the idea, road, the road to Damascus experience. Some of you have used that as a common phrase, as a pop culture phrase, right, right? My road to Damascus experience, you know, and some of you use the idea of, I've blinded by the light, I found the light, I was enlightened, that's where you get this, this, this, this, you know, road to Damascus experience that he had where Jesus visited him and he was changed and he was transformed. And why are you persecuting me, Saul?

And then he gained the name Paul. He was given the name Paul. And instead of destroying churches and breaking down churches, instead he was actually building churches. He planted churches all around the Mediterranean in these port cities and he was building the kingdom of God. Amazing road to Damascus experience.

And in this letter, he talks to Christians about their mouths. And in James's letter, he kind of left us hanging, right? He's, he kind of left us hanging, right? He's, he kind of said, mouths are this, mouths are that. You shouldn't do this with your mouth.

This is bad with your mouth. And then he just kind of cuts out and says, okay, you go figure it out. But Paul gives us a way. Paul gives us more information. He gives us a picture that we can't, can use to leverage how we use our mouths to accomplish what we need to accomplish.

So let me just start off by saying this. If you are not a follower of Jesus, this letter is not for you. You are not held accountable to this letter. You are not held. So, so don't feel like as you hear this and how, as you're getting instruction for this, don't feel like you're, you should, you should, you should, you shouldn't feel that way about this letter because this wasn't written for you.

It was written for Christians. But if you're a Christian, this is written for you. This is absolutely written for you. This was a letter that was written for you to give you, I, um, to give you instruction in order how to handle your Christian life. So, uh, I'll give.

I'll give you the scripture in a minute about mouths, but I want to lead up with that by starting in Ephesians 4, 17 through 24. And if you do not have a Bible on you, you can go to the YouVersion Bible app. You can pull up Salt Church. There's events there. You can find Salt Church.

And I have the scripture there for you. And there's a place where you can put some notes in place. We don't have paper notes right now. We haven't done that since COVID, but most of you are electronic anyway. So that kind of works.

So let's just pick up there in verse 17 of chapter 4, if you're following along with us. And he's writing to Gentiles, okay? He's not writing to Jewish people. He's writing to Gentiles who have become Christians, who left this pagan world view. And he's trying, and they're all trying, they're all trying to sort out this new way of life, this new thing called Jesus that they're following, this new thing called Christianity or the way.

They're trying to figure this thing out because they'd always operated under a certain world view, and they had this new world view, this new idea. And he starts here. He says, so I tell you this and insist on it in the Lord that you must no longer live the way the Gentiles do in the futility of their thinking. Now, let's just stop there. Paul is speaking to Gentiles, okay?

So they used to be pagans. They used to be polytheists, meaning they worshiped many gods, and they had this different world view, which was reflected in their behavior, just like your world view reflects how you live out your life. That reflects your behavior. And they had these behaviors that they always were in, and this new thing was just different for them. And then he goes on in verse 18, he says, and they are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of their heart.

Now, at first, when you read this, you're like, that's insulting. That's kind of insulting. But Paul wasn't giving insults. He was actually just giving an observation. He was like, they just don't know.

They just don't get it. They don't have any idea because this is the way they always lived. So he was saying the people you deal with in culture do not know any better because they can't see what you see. They don't know what you know. They haven't found what you found yet.

So they're living a certain way. They're still living that way, and they're ignorant. They don't understand. They're still in darkness. They haven't been enlightened.

They haven't seen the light. They haven't had the road to Damascus experience that I have and you have. So here's the thing. They believed in a... And these pagan gods were all about themselves.

They were all about themselves. They toyed with people. They slept with each other. They had multiple kids who were constantly going crazy, killing each other, fighting each other, sleeping with each other, even in their own families. And they were killing each other and causing things.

It was just crazy. And polytheism was all about being the gods. And paganism followed right along with that idea, that worldview, that I'm in it for myself, and that if the might is right, if I have gold, then I have privilege, right? And it was bad luck to be poor. It was bad luck to be a woman.

And it was certainly bad luck to be conquered, because I'm in it to win it. That's the way they saw things. That's the way they saw their world. And it was a winner-take-all world. That's the way they viewed their world.

So Paul was talking to a ton of ex-pagans, okay? A ton of ex-polytheistic people. The world that they... And he's saying the world that you came from is different from the worldview that you have now. So I need you to understand there's a different way of thinking, there's a different way of living, and they have a different worldview.

And then he goes on in verse 19, he says, Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to all sensuality. It's an anything-goes world. They had no list of... They understood what truth was. This was truth because there was no...

They didn't know what truth was because there was no religious morality set in place. And as a Christian, there is a morality associated with Christianity. We have something that we can go by. We have a foundation in which we build our morals on. But they had no clue.

They had no idea. They didn't know. They just lived the way they lived. And in Christianity, in terms of how we treat people, we have something that we go by. We understand what it means to be faithful in our marriages.

We understand how to treat our wives and how to treat our husbands and how to treat our children. But in paganism, there was none. And Paul is saying, No wonder that people behave the way they do. Because they don't know. They don't have rules.

They don't have anything to identify this moral code, this code that has been set in place that we've placed in Christianity. So he says this. It's not a criticism. It's just... And it goes on to say, so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, and they were full of greed.

And then he goes on in verse 20, he says, that, however, is not the way of life you learned. When I came the first time and I taught you this stuff and you gave your life to Jesus, when you found the true God, this is not the way, that greedy, in-it-for-yourself lifestyle that everybody else lives, that everybody, you just treat people terrible, you treat people with disrespect, that's not the life that you live now. That's not the life that you're living now. And then in verse 21 he says, when you heard about Christ and you were taught in him in accordance with the truth that is in Jesus. Now let me say this, this is really cool.

You should be grateful for Jesus, the Apostle Paul, and the church. You should be grateful for Jesus and the Apostle Paul and the church because they advocated in the first century what you assume. They advocated in that day what you assume. You assume that people have individual rights. You assume that women should be treated equally, right?

You assume that. You assume that sexual harassment and sexual abuse is wrong. You assume that the poor should be treated fair and treated with dignity and treated as a person. You assume these things. Why?

You assume them because they're leftovers from Christian teaching. That the world was impacted, that the Western culture was impacted by Paul, by the church, and by Jesus Christ. And not everyone thinks that way. Not everyone did think that way. And even in culture today, in certain cultures, not everybody thinks that way.

Dignity of the individual is assumed most and pronounced in culture's influence and impacted by Christianity. Dignity of the individual is assumed most and pronounced in culture's influence and impacted by Christianity. And that's not true in every culture. That's just not true in every culture in the world. But in the cultures where it's, it is primarily Europe and the United States, it was impacted by Christianity, by Christian teaching.

And that's not to say that everyone's Christians. Of course not. Of course not. But the fact that Christianity brought this idea that men and women and children were made in the image of God and they have intrinsic value, that was brought by Christianity. That was brought by Jesus and the Apostle Paul.

And when Paul was writing this letter, that was not the assumption, that was not the worldview held in that day. It was not the popular thought. The might was right. If you had gold, you ran things, and if you were a Roman, you were cut above everybody else. And that's how they thought.

And he advocated, and the reason we value what we value is because of the teachings of Jesus, the Apostle Paul, and the church. And he goes on to say, you were taught with regard to your former way of life to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by deceitful desires. So Paul was saying, the first time I came to you and taught this, you had an old coat, you had a heavy coat. But when you found Christ, when you found God, when you found the true God, you took off that old coat, that heavy coat that you were wearing, and you were putting on a new coat. But he used the analogy of a coat that we put on this clothing, we put on this coat, and you no longer live that heavy coat life anymore.

And then he says, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires. Now, what is a deceitful desire? What is a deceitful desire? It's a selfish desire that promises you one thing, and doesn't fulfill that promise. It's a deceitful desire that promises you one thing, and doesn't, doesn't fulfill that promise.

It's a selfish desire that promises you one thing, but you don't, it doesn't deliver. It doesn't deliver. And guess what they whisper? They whisper, next time. Next time.

See, he did it this way, this time. But next time. It's their fault, but next time. And it whispers next time to you, and you keep going. It's deceitful.

It's deceitful. It's leading you into deceit. It's a deceitful desire. And it didn't work out this time, but it's his or her fault. It takes off the old approach, but Paul's saying you take off that approach.

You take off that approach, and you put on a new approach. And then in verse 23, it says, to be made new in the attitude of your mind. It's going to be. So when you embrace this new idea, this new way of thinking, you will not be like the gods. You will be like God.

And you won't toy with people. You won't treat people with disrespect and without dignity. You will not follow the ways these pagan gods lived. You will not do that because you have a Heavenly Father who doesn't treat you badly. You have a Heavenly Father that treats you with dignity.

You have a Heavenly Father that gave His Son for you, who shed His blood for you, who forgave you of your sins. You have a Heavenly Father that loves you. And you were created with true righteousness and holiness. And it isn't the type of holiness that disengages from the world. It's a holiness that engages with those who are like you, aren't like you, and engages with those who don't like you, and engages with people.

So we need to embrace, He's saying, we embrace this others first, others matter ethic, unlike the gods. And God is concerned about how we treat others. It's a new world. It's a new way of thinking. Then He gives specific application.

And He begins with our mouths. And this is where it gets down and dirty. So hang in and trail with me just for a second. In Ephesians 29, 429, He says, Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths. Any wholesome talk come out of your mouth.

So wholesome talk basically means the words that we use. And in terms of unwholesome, it refers to rotten fish, rotten fruit, or wore-out shoes and sandals. It's anything distasteful. So we need to avoid fish mouth, okay? We need to avoid fish mouth.

In fact, that's a term we all should start using in our church. Anytime we hear somebody start talking about somebody, say something, maybe use some kind of unwholesome talk, we should say, avoid fish mouth. Don't go fish mouth. Oh, your mouth is really reeking of fish right now, okay? Maybe that's a term we should use, but literally that's what it means.

And I think that's what it means. Thank you. In that context. So we should start calling each other that, right? And it's not just telling the truth, because pagans, they knew to tell the truth, but they took it to a whole other level.

Christianity took it to a whole other level. Not anything, not any unwholesome talk, not anything that you put, nothing should be there. What you say, what you do, how you regard others, how you treat others, the dignity that you treat. And then he echoes what we learn from James. He says, do not let.

He focuses on that let. Do not let any unwholesome talk. That means it's your responsibility, right? Don't even let it come out. You are the gatekeeper.

Don't let them out. They're there, and they're ready to come out, right? We've all experienced it, right? I've got it. It's in there.

I don't even understand why it's there. But we don't let it come out. We are the gatekeepers of our mouth. We don't let it. And then he says this.

He says, the don't, and then next up is what we are supposed to do. And he says, but, and he puts a stark contrast, but, but here's what we are to do, but only what is helpful in building others up in accordance to their needs. So we need to check it at the gate when those, those, those words come up. Are they helpful? When, when, when you go through an airport, right?

Check the baggage. Is this helpful? You know, they're pulling out the stuff that doesn't need to go and the stuff that does this. Is this what I need? When, when we have words, is this words going to be helpful?

Are they going to build people up? Now, I'll just be honest with you. This sounds so nice and so, so soft and so Christian, you know, like, like, let's be helpful, you know, let's be, but it, but it seems so unproductive. It seems so unproductive, right? I mean, how do we raise kids that way?

You know, a teenager, oh, try just not occasionally go over the speed limit, you know, 20 miles an hour on the interstate, you know, could, could you just hold it down just a little bit? That just doesn't make a lot of sense, right? Or, or imagine being an employer. If you would just try to come in occasionally to work, just, just try, you know, that just doesn't seem to work. So Paul's point is not be nice.

He says, be helpful because sometimes we're going to have to have the hard conversations and they're going to be very hard. We've got to sit down with people. So you know, So he's telling, for some of you, you need to dial it back a little bit and not be so harsh, right? But others of you need to step it up and let's have real conversations with people, right? And it's not about being nice, he's not talking about being nice, because sometimes it's not nice, but it's being truthful and it's being helpful, and they need to be helpful, and helpful according to the person you were talking to.

And then he goes on in verse 29, what is helpful in building others up, and what he's using here is construction language. That you're walking in on a construction site that has a building that hasn't been built, and your words are the material, so you're going in there and you're building something up, you're building something either good or you're tearing something down. You're walking into a construction site, he uses this idea of a construction site. And by that, when you leave that construction site, when you leave that conversation, the people you're speaking to should be better off for having spoken with you than they were when you first arrived. As Jesus followers, we should be people who leave things better off when we arrive, and when we speak, and when we have conversations than when we first arrive, that they should be better off by the time we leave that situation.

And could you imagine what would happen? Could you imagine how our marriages would be? Could you imagine how our friendships would be? Could you imagine how our church could be and would be if we walked into conversations, if we walked into relationships, and we walked into situations where we were building construction sites that made it better than when we first arrived? And then he goes on to say, according to their needs.

And now this is hard for me because I want it to be according to my needs. When I have conversations with people, it's about me. It's about my needs. It's about what I want in that context of what I want and I need. But it's not about me.

It's about them. It's about when I'm having these conversations. It's about them. Who we're talking to is as important as what we're talking about. So what do they need to hear?

Here's what he goes on to say. That is that it may benefit those who listen. That it may benefit those who listen. Not what benefits me, but them. Because I want it to benefit me.

I want to be the wise one here. Right? I want my zingers to play in, right? I want to be the one with the knowledge. I want them to hear my words because it's about me.

I want them to hear me. But whenever that happens with me, when I'm having a conversation with people, I can hear God saying, but Leon, that's about you. And that's the way the pagans live. That's the old way of life. That's the way it once was.

And that's the way, that's not the way of God. They should be better off talking with us. And Paul's concern is both the context and intent of our words that we leave with people, and hopefully they're better off as a result. Then, in case we still don't get it, Paul kind of leans in a little more, and he says, and do not grieve the Holy Spirit, okay? What does he mean by that?

Do not grieve the Holy Spirit. He says, don't make God go, oh, don't say that. Oh, I can't believe you said that to that person. I can't believe that happened. Why did you do that?

You're not building them up. You're breaking them down. You're demolishing their building. Why are you doing that? And it's as if the Apostle Paul stops for a minute before he goes to the next verse.

He says, you know what? My people really aren't going to get this. They aren't really going to get this, and I need to get a little harder. I need to lean in a little more, and I need to get a little more specific. And we ask, why is it that we have these things rise up in us?

Why do we have these things that we say and we do? Why did I say that? Why did I think that? Why do these things happen? Sometimes we just don't understand why, when I have those conversations with people and I say things, why in the world did I say that thing?

Why didn't I say something that would build them up and instead gave them something that tore them down? This is where Paul goes with it. He says, we need to get rid of all bitterness. Get rid of all bitterness. And the people were like, I thought we were talking about mouths here.

He says, we are. That's the root of it. Your bitterness makes you say the things you say. It makes you think the things you think. It makes the things that rise up in you.

It's your bitterness. So you need to take care of the bitterness. It's not stop being bitter. It says, get rid of the bitterness. That means take it, put it in a garbage bag, and take it out by the street.

Get rid of it. And bitterness doesn't show up in what we say, but show up. It shows up in how we say what we say and who we say it to. And you can't build if you're bitter. You can't build if you have bitterness in your heart.

Because the antidote for bitterness requires forgiveness. The antidote for bitterness requires forgiveness. Where do our words come from? Where do they? Perhaps you grew up in a home.

Maybe you never got any positive reactions from your parents or people that were in your life. And even when they gave you something positive and encouraging, it was with a hint of criticism or sarcasm. And maybe that's where you are. And the words were used to take from you what you should have been able to keep for yourself. They took words from you.

They put you down. They made you small. And they took your esteem. And they took your reputation. And they took your time.

So we come into new relationships and we bring these old wounds, those things that were said to us, those things that were placed in our hearts, and we take them into new relationships and we place them unfairly on those new relationships. And we put that baggage on them. And we put that baggage on them. And then we say the things we say and we think the things we think that come out about them because of something someone else did, because we're holding bitterness. And it affects our words.

It affects our tone. And it affects the way we say things. And it also affects what we refuse to say because of our pride. And Paul is saying, I hate to get in your personal business here, like I talk to some of you sometimes. I hate to get in your personal business here.

But here's why it's going on. But you can't be a builder if you're bitter. You can no longer be bitter to be a builder. Because here's forgiveness. Here's a good definition of forgiveness.

Forgiveness is this. Giving someone from the past what they don't deserve so we can give those around us what they do deserve. We need to give someone from the past what they don't deserve, forgiveness, so that we can give those around us what they do deserve. If you are parents, you need to deal with that bitterness because you're going to place it unfairly on your children. If you're a grandparent, you'll do that with your grandchildren.

You have to fix that bitterness. You can't be a builder if you're a builder. If you are bitter. So he says, get rid of all bitterness. And he goes on to say rage and anger and brawling, yelling and screaming and all those things.

And the instruction is stop, but not just to stop, but get rid of it. Get it out of your life. Get it out of your house. Get it out of, just put it out in the street. Get rid of all the bitterness to rage, anger, to brawling.

And then he also goes into slander. What is slander? The things that we say that aren't true because we, the bitterness in our hearts and in our lives, the things that we say, why did I even think that? Why did I even say that? That's not even who they are.

It's just because I'm bitter and because I'm angry because of what I have placed unfairly on that person because of my history or because of something. So we need to get rid of words that demean, degrade, and disrespect. Hold on, I'm landing this message in just a second in case some of you're wondering. Demean, degrade, and disrespect. What does demean mean?

It means you don't matter. You don't matter to anyone. You don't matter. But God says, well, they matter to me. He matters to me.

She matters to me. Degrade means to lower the grade of somebody, right? It means they don't meet the standards of someone. But God says, you know, they meet my standards. And then he reminds me, you know, your standards.

Leon, did you measure up to my standards? No, you didn't measure up to my standards. So why would their standards be lower than how I feel about you? Or disrespect, you know, you're not worth respecting. And you may not think he or she is worthy of respect, but God says, that's my son.

That's my daughter. I love them, and you need to respect them. And Paul says, this is a new way of thinking. You have been called to see people differently. This is not the pagan way.

This is not, this is the Christ followers way. And you, your life is completely different now. Your life is completely different now. You have a new worldview. You have a new way of living, and you see things different.

And instead, here's how you build. He says, be kind. Be kind. Just be kind. Now, that doesn't mean be nice.

Sometimes we have to have hard conversations again. But be kind. It's not what you say. It's the way you say it. The way you say it.

Be kind with your work. And then he says, he goes on, he says, how kind? Be compassionate. It means it's dialing into the emotions of the person you are interacting with. Figure out where they're.

What your emotions are, where they are in the process. Be compassionate. Well, how compassionate? He says, forgiving each other. Forgiving each other.

Be compassionate, forgiving each other. Well, how much should I forgive them as much as they've forgiven me? He says, no, no, that's not. That's not how you do it. You are to forgive.

You are to forgive. He says, well, how much, Paul? He says, Paul will be like, I'm sorry you asked, because I'm getting ready to tell you. Just as, just as in Christ, God forgave. You.

Just as God forgave you. He was compassionate to you. He was forgiving to you. And when you, when you were not worthy, when you were not someone who was to be respected, when you were not someone who was to be, who probably needed to be degraded, he saw you. He loved you.

He was compassionate. He was kind to you. And he gave his life to you. And y'all have heard of the golden rule, but we have this thing called the platinum rule. And it's to do for others what God and Christ has done for you.

Do to others as God and Christ has done for you. What if we took that in the context of our words and say, speak unto others as God and Christ has spoken to you? What if we did that? Speak unto others as God and Christ has done to you. Could you imagine what kind of world it would be?

What kind of people we could be? Our families could be? Our relationships could be? Our church could be? Our marriages could be?

If this became normal, could you imagine what kind of world we would have? So allow God's grace to shape and inform your words towards others. Be a builder. Don't have fish mouth, okay? No fish mouth in here today.

So I'm going to leave you with just a few applications here. And I want to ask you a few questions. And we're going to actually repeat this scripture again. And we're going to put it all together. The first one is, where do you have work to do?

Okay? Where do you have work to do? What kind of bitterness do I have? Where do I have work to do? And the second one is, who hopes you'll get to work soon?

Who out there is hoping that you will get to work soon? And it's often the people that we're closest to, right? It's crazy, but it's often the people that we're closest to that tend to hurt us. And we... We tend to hurt them.

And if you're someone who's easily critical and sarcastic, can I let you know this? You can never build anyone up with sarcasm. You can never build anyone up with criticism. You can never build anybody up. Dads, fathers, you can never, you can't make your sons tough by being sarcastic and critical to them.

It won't make them tougher. It'll just make it harder for you to connect with them. And mothers, the same thing with your daughters, you can't do that because it will just make it harder for them to connect with you. Sarcasm and demeaning talk and criticism never builds anybody up. Nobody wins when that happens.

And the Apostle Paul says to stop it. Just stop it. Stop doing it. So let's repeat this in its entirety real quick and then I'll give you one more thought and then we'll go home, have lunch, go to the beach. I know some of you are ready to get out of here.

We got a clap. We got a clap back there. That's our tech team for you. Ephesians 4, 29 and 32. Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouth, but only what is helpful in building others up according what?

To their needs. We want to build them up. We want to build their houses. We want to build them up that it may benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Spirit.

Do not make God go, oh, why did you do that? Why did you hurt my heart that way? We don't want to grieve the Spirit of God with whom you were sealed from the day of redemption, but get rid of all bitterness, all that bitterness and rage and anger and brawling and slander along with every other form of malice. And then he says, be kind and compassionate. Dial into the emotions of the person that you're, you're, you're, you're working with.

Be kind and compassion to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ, God forgave you. And my suggestion is that we all need to take time and memorize that. It's really easy to look it up. 429, just look it up and find it's very, very popular, popular set of scriptures. But because this is what I know, it will make you a better person.

It will make you a better husband. It'll make, make you a better wife. It'll make you a better boss. It'll make you a better boss. Whoever you're with, it will make you a better son and make you a better daughter.

So do not let unwholesome talk come out of your mouth, but only what is helpful in building others. If that doesn't work for you, then here's another suggestion. I'd like you just to, this week, take out a paper and a pad. I'm not talking about an iPad, okay? I'm talking about, you know, one of those things you draw on, they're like pieces of paper, and they're kind of old school, I know.

You can actually get them at Target and stuff. And I want you to write down some of those things that you have in your life. There's this bitterness that you hold on to. And I want, as a symbolic example of getting rid of the things that you're dealing with, as a symbolic example, I want you to ball that thing up. I want you to get a trash bag, and I want you to walk out.

Put it in the garbage. Put it at the street. Put it out of your life. Put those things out of your life. Paul says to get rid of it.

And if that seems too much to ask in light of how you are treated, how you feel, how the bitterness that you have for the words that were shared with you and words that were spoken over to you, next week's story is going to be incredible. If Jesus is the greatest story told, next week's story is going to be the second greatest story ever told. So you need to be here to hear that part of the story. So if you would just stand with me, and I just want to give people the opportunity to lay that bitterness down as we pray, as we ask God to move in our hearts and lives. And if you would just close your eyes and hold out your hands, and I just want you to be honest with God here for a minute.

I want you to just begin to think about the things that you may be holding on that you've unfairly placed on your people that are closest to you. And I want you just to confess that to God today. God, I know I've been bitter. I know I've been holding on to these things. I know I have these hurtful words, and I've placed them on other people, God.

But I ask you, I ask you, God, to help me. I ask you, I'm going to put them out. I pray that you would stand guard over my mouth, over my thoughts. And over my heart, Lord Jesus, help me, Lord, to see people with dignity and respect, not degrading, not demeaning, not with disrespect, but I would give them meaning and I would give them respect and I would see their significance, Lord, and that people would be better off, God, I want people to be better off by virtue of me being there and what I'm saying and just being with them, Lord. And in that same spirit, there are some of you that have been holding on to bitterness for years.

There's a Heavenly Father that says, I love you, I don't care what you feel about yourself, I don't care what you've been through, I don't care where you are. But today, maybe this is the day, because we are to be quick to listen and slow to speak, but did you know that Jesus was quick to listen and slow to speak? For 30 years, He was quick to listen. He listened and grew in stature. And then one day, He spoke.

One day, He spoke. And He showed us love. He showed us the Father. When we look to Jesus, we see the Father. And today, you can make a decision for Jesus.

The bitterness can be gone. We can put it out. We don't have to live underneath the hurtful words and the wounds of our lives. We don't have to live that way anymore. And it takes the first step.

The first step is believing that Jesus Christ is the Son of God, that He died on the cross for your sin, and He wants to make a way for you. So here, just say that with me. Believe that with me. If that's you here today, if that's you, if you're ready, you're ready. You say, Lord, I've tried to do it my own way for so long, God, but today I'm committing my life to you.

I give my life to you, Lord, that I believe that you are the Son of God, that you died on the cross for my sin. A sin that I couldn't meet. A fault I couldn't fix. A crack I couldn't feel, Lord. And you, so come into my life, Lord.

Come into my heart. Make me new today. In Jesus' name. Amen. Can y'all give God a hand clap of praise?

We just thank God for His salvation, His Holy Spirit. And I didn't ask people to raise hands. I do that on occasion. But here's the thing, guys. If you gave your heart...

Let us know. We want to know. Fill out that card in your seat. Let us know that you gave your life to Christ. We'll send some information to you.

Connect with somebody at the table. Grab some next steps. Let's get baptized. We have a baptism coming in July. We've got a lot of cool things coming for you to take next steps.

Get plugged into a salt group. Get plugged into a team. We would love for you to be a part of the family. We're growing our family. We're building our family, the salt family.

God is doing some incredible things. God bless you guys. My wife is going to come up and end this off really quick. It won't take but a second, but I love you. I'll be outside.

I'd love to meet you if you're new with us. Connect with me, and we'd love to get to know you. God bless you. Can you hear me now? There we go.

Thank you guys. We're not passing around buckets or anything right now. We have it for a long time, but if you would like to give, you still can. Just as a reminder, if you're a first-time guest, we ask that you don't give. We would love for you to just take this service as a gift to you.

We don't want you to feel pressured to give at all. But if you are a regular attender and you would like to, there are multiple ways that you can. You can, of course, give physically here out in the, is that a foyer, a lobby? You can give out there. You can also text the amount you want to give to 84321, and you can give securely through Planning Center Recurring Giving.

So neat. You can do it that way. Or you can, of course, always just mail something in to our PO box, and I think there should be giving slides up that will show you that. We just appreciate that. We appreciate you continuing to give and to support us financially with all of the dreams that we have for a building and outreach and community events, and you guys just make that happen, not just financially, but prayerfully, and giving of your time and your emotion and your energy and your thoughts and your hands.

And we are the hands and feet of Jesus. Thank you for just continuing to be that way. Thank you for being here. See you guys next week on Memorial Weekend, Memorial Day Weekend. We're going to have a wonderful service outside.

There's going to be amazing food. God is going to bless us, and I can't wait to see you guys there. Have a good week.